You’re a fraud and you know it
But it’s too good to throw it all away
Anyone would do the same
You’ve got ’em going
And you’re careful not to show it
Sometimes you even fool yourself a bit it’s like magic
But it’s always been a smoke and mirrors game
Anyone would do the same
Smoke and Mirrors – Gotye
Writer Gotye 2011
In my world you learn not to trust too easily. The smoke, the mirrors — they are all an illusion – a darkness, a deception, a misdirection – in which it is all too easy to you lose your true sense of self. If you know enough of the right people, are seen in the right places, can spin the right spin, then it is easy to blur the lines between right and wrong. However, if you are aware of the games being played, then deception is often easy to recognize in others. The false platitudes, the disingenuous smiles, the fake flattery. It is a truism – the more beautiful the people, the uglier their lies. Look – can you see? A moment of hesitation, followed by a backhanded compliment loaded with envy, and a touch of lust lurking just beneath the surface.
This is the world I was born into. I attended the right schools, lived in the right neighborhoods, knew the right people. It was all about networks. Whose version of ‘right’? Well — theirs? Yours? Ours? Who knows?
Mine is a media family. My father and grandfather built empires in global media, doing their time at the news desk before ascending the throne to rule their fiefdoms. I always knew I wanted to end up here. Partly because I have a nose for a good story and partly because I have a deep desire to hold the mirror up to the world. I know the secrets, I smell their crap, I know where to dig.
To the world I am just another one of the beautiful people. Connected, well-educated, well-spoken. My looks open doors, even more than trading on my father’s name. I am not afraid to use either.
So when an enigma like Christian Grey walks through this world, I feel the need to crack his code. We are similar, he and I. Too attractive for the rest of the world to leave alone. Too aware of how they perceive that beauty to trust others. Keeping a distance, keeping secrets. He comes from a family of beautiful people; his mother – a doctor, his father – a lawyer, his brother and sister talented, successful and beautiful like him. They flit through our world of shadows and light, assuming a mantle of philanthropy but I know there are secrets and lies underneath. There always are.
My feet straddle the border between two worlds. One I was born into and one where I breathe. That second world is a simpler one, where caring and hard work count. Where good friends can be relied upon. Where the secrets are harder to keep. My good friend, my best friend Ana, lives in this other world. Refreshingly welcome in my life, she doesn’t lie, she doesn’t pretend, she doesn’t watch with envy waiting for me to fall. There’s no competition because she lacks guile. She simply doesn’t see that she could command in that other world. For her, it as a space I inhabit, apart from her, and she seems to like it that way. Friends like Ana are hard to find. I cherish that friendship as I would a sister.
So it is with a sense of foreboding that I sent her stumbling into his world on my behalf. I had no choice. It was the interview of a lifetime and I was too sick to lift my head off the pillow. Ana was my back up plan. I deliberately told her nothing about him, reasoning that the less she knew the safer she would be. In and out. Get the story and never set foot there again. How wrong could I be?
Guest 8/13/13 . chapter 1Great start. LoveMyMan2 8/12/13 . chapter 1Love it so far! anoname 7/3/13 . chapter 1Very interesting! I’ve only read the first chapter of Book 1, but I can’t wait to see what happens. Carmelroads 3/16/13 . chapter 1Ok so idk what has taken me so long to read your stories. I am one of about 10 people who actually liked Kate in the books. Can’t wait to see where you take this. ohcara 11/25/12 . chapter 1Because of this, I’ve learned to love Kate! Thanks to you! I love you! fmiles 11/4/12 . chapter 1I have read your story and it’s a fresh breath of air. I was looking for a story outside the normal pair and I’m glad I found yours, tho I see you took some liberties with some characters background.. I don’t mind that. I anyways really good story, good writing and I’m waiting for more chapters
Thanks for sharing
Fefe3 10/26/12 . chapter 1I can tell this will be a great story from the first chapter. I love how you’ve chosen to go with the POV of Kate variety is the spice of life.