I love you
But I gotta stay true
My morals got me on my knees
I’m beggin’ please
Stop playin’ games
I don’t know what this is
Cause you got me good
Just like you knew you would
I don’t know what you do
but you do it well
I’m under your spell.
You got me beggin’ you for (yeah yeah yeah)
Why won’t you release me (yeah yeah yeah)
You got me beggin’ you for mercy (yeah yeah yeah)
Why won’t you release me (yeah yeah yeah)
I said release me (yeah yeah yeah)
My body is aching from the type of constant work out that I haven’t indulged in for the past two years at least. I ache in muscles that I forgot I had but it is a good feeling that makes me question the sanity of building a career around a desk job. The morning has been spent working the ring routine. It is unbelievable to perform and Elliot has the most amazing body to work around but he was right about one thing. Doing this routine is going to feel like having sex in public and for the life of me I can’t work out why that turns me on so much. There is something deeply sensual about the way we have to maintain constant contact with our bodies or risk injury and because I am new to the apparatus everything has to be slow and controlled which creates a kind of fluid tension between us and my senses are totally heightened.
In the afternoon the girls come in and we work on the pole routine. The tricks that Max took me through yesterday are really solid and I am feeling quite comfortable with what I have to do. I can sense eyes on me from the audience. It seems that everyone who is hanging around during the day has decided to stop by our rehearsal and the audience has doubled since yesterday. Elliot seems to know everyone and I see him watching them as if trying to gauge their reaction to the routine. Maybe he is being protective but he doesn’t have that brooding scowl on his face that I saw Christian get whenever another guy looked at Ana at the masquerade.
My frustration builds over the chair routine. I still don’t feel confident about it and it seems strange that this is the one dance that scares me the most. Once more the music starts and once more I go for the balance trick where we climb the chair and then tip it over and once more I chicken out at the last minute, pulling back and getting in one of the other dancer’s way. What the hell is wrong with me? Max calls a break and I go over to where Stella is sitting in the audience muttering to myself as I grab a towel to wipe myself down.
“Kate, we could drop you out of this routine, you know. You’ve worked so hard on the others and there is no need to push yourself to get this one as well. No one would notice if you weren’t in it.” Freezing in mid movement I steal a look at Stella who is being very understanding. With a tight smile, I try to show her how grateful I am. She has been great for even trying to include me but every time we hit a road block they alter the routine and I know this puts pressure on the other girls.
“I feel like I am letting everyone down no matter what we do.” I don’t mean to be petulant but the perfectionist in me wants to do well and is slutted that she can’t.
“You know there is another way you could include her.” Elliot walks up behind me and wraps his hands around my waist, and plants a wet kiss on my cheek. He’s buttering me up for something. Looking over my shoulder at him I wonder what he is up to. “She could sing that number live while the others dance.”
Stella claps her hands and jumps up out of her seat excitedly. Turning to Elliot, I place my hand on his chest and push backwards away from him in disbelief. Are you kidding me, Grey?
“Oh, no, no, no. No way. I think I am doing enough, don’t you? A pole routine, a dance routine and the aerial…that is enough for my nerves right now.”
“Come on babe, all you have done for the past two days is sing that damn song over and over in the car . I know that you know it. Hell, you could give Nicole Scherzinger a run for her money. In fact, I am not sure that you haven’t been singing it in your sleep. I know I have.” His wide grin is infectious but he is playing into my anxiety here. I would almost rather get the chair routine wrong than sing in public.
“Great, you sing it then.” Being backed into a corner like this is giving me the shits.
“Oh, Kate, why don’t you just try. If you still feel uncomfortable at the end of the rehearsal then we’ll go back to the vocal track but it would be so great if you could do it. Since Marla left we haven’t had anyone who could sing any of the songs live.” Sweet, sweet Stella looks like she will drop onto her knees at any moment and quite frankly, my defenses are down right now.
“Yeah, sis, you will be great.” Ethan has been sitting through this afternoon’s session waiting for us to finish. “You always do this, like it is the worst thing anyone could ask you to do. It is such a waste of talent.” Shit, now even my brother is ganging up on me.
“Okay, okay.” But I can guarantee that my nerves will get the better of me and it will be a disaster. “As long as we can all agree that if it doesn’t work this afternoon that we drop it.”
“Yay! TJ can you organize the Beta58 for Kate.” TJ nods from across the room and disappears up to the control booth. Moments later he returns with a wireless microphone in his hand. “Great, I would give you a head mic but sometimes it is good to have something in your hand to play with when you’re nervous. You will need to concentrate on the position of it and that might be enough to take your mind off your nerves.”
“Pretty phallic, don’t you think?” Although I can’t fault her logic but I already know that the outcome will be disastrous and I don’t think I will have to worry past this first rehearsal. I know the routine that the girls are doing so it is easy to maneuver my way around them while they work the chairs. Max talks me through some other movement options and we map out a walk into the audience in the second verse. After a run through of the singing without the movement I go up on stage.
“Were you trying to make a statement with this song?” I throw this question at Max since he is the artistic director and has selected the material for the entertainment section of the evening.
“Sweets, I have no idea what you mean.” I giggle. Singing a medley about a tainted love and then begging for mercy seems like a fairly strong judgment on the crowd.
“They just aren’t very subtle selections.”
“If I wanted subtle we would be doing and Beat Me Daddy Eight to the Bar.” He slaps his hand on his leather clad ass as he walks away from the stage.
Laughing I turn to face upstage as the first strains of the music come on. The girls go into their routine and I channel my inner pussycat, working my way through the rehearsal trying to remember lyrics, balance in these stupidly tall thigh high boots and not get in the way of the girls as they dance. The easiest way to do this is to focus on Elliot while pretending that I am someone else. If I feel like I am playing a character, which essentially I will have to do so that ‘Jack’ doesn’t recognize me then the singing seems to come easily. I pretend that I am a real burlesque singer, a submissive, performing for my dom. I visualize us in Christian’s playroom, Elliot working me over with a flogger or paddle. I see myself collared and being shown off by him to the club. Using the most salacious and provocative body movements in my repertoire my focus is on seducing him from the distance of the stage. It is certainly working for me and I notice every hitch of his breath as I stroke down my own thighs and rotate my hips. But while I am trying to concentrate solely on Elliot I can also feel the other men in the room watching me and I feel a little guilty that this collective attention is turning me on.
By four in the afternoon I am both totally convinced that I can pull off the singing and totally spent. Elliot seems just as eager to get me home. He calls ahead and Jen has a bath waiting for me when we arrive at his house. Rather than leave me to it, Elliot climbs in with me which is just as well because I could fall asleep and drown in this water if he wasn’t there to support me. He gently massages my shoulders and rubs my back, helping me to unlock my tightened muscles. His fingers are strong but gentle and I can’t stop myself from moaning with every stroke. After half an hour of soaking and massage he starts a conversation that I thought I would never have with any guy.
“You like being watched don’t you?” His words cut through my reverie and I sit up a little bit. How does he know? Was I that obvious? “It’s okay, babe, in some ways I liked it too.”
“What do you mean? Do you like the girls standing around watching you?” I keep my eyes close and nuzzle my head back against his shoulder hoping to deflect the conversation away from my kinkiness.
“No, I mean I like the guys standing around watching you. There is something about being able to see them lusting after you and knowing that you are mine.” I really feel like I should be shocked but his words are turning me on. Does this means he likes to see me flirt? “You know when you were dancing with James in the club in Barbados, that got me hot. I kind of like seeing you do your flirty thing. It makes me want to rip your panties off and fuck you in a dim corridor or something.”
“What? You’d like to see me with another guy? Making love to someone else?” I’m not sure where this is going but my reaction is kind of scary. I’ve gone from aching muscles to aching for his touch within seconds.
“Not exactly, I mean I’ve never been the jealous type so not wanting to share you is kind of new for me. I just love watching you getting off, I like other guys wanting you. Part of me wanted to fuck you on that stage for real this morning, not just simulate it. It got to the point this morning where it wouldn’t have phased me to have everyone in the room watch us while we screwed each other senseless.” His voice is low and hoarse and my body is reacting so fast that I could almost come with just his words. “Does that freak you out?”
I think about it for a moment. “No, I could almost imagine that you were. I don’t know how you don’t get turned on when we’re dancing. Doing that first bit of floor work gets me so wet that I think the audience could probably smell me from the first row.” I want to be embarrassed but I’m not.
“I could. Your wet pussy is my favorite smell. In fact…” His hands slide down my arms and into the water to cover my hands. Very slowly he guides one hand up to my breast and manipulates my fingers until they are rolling my nipple while he gentle sucks my neck. His voice is a low whisper. “I want to watch you now.”
He pushes my other hand down between my legs and forces my fingers onto my aching clit. Setting up a gentle motion we traces lazy circles around my swollen mound as he presses his stiff erection into my back.
“God, baby, I need to see you.”
Quickly he lifts me up and sits me on the side of the bath tub spreading my thighs wide. Placing my hands back over my glistening mound, he kisses me fully on the mouth, thrusting his tongue in a full on assault before pulling away and sitting across the tub from me. His eyes burn with lust-filled intensity and my fingers slide, bathed in my own cream.
“Touch yourself, Katie. Let me see you.” I moan and tip my head back against the wall. For a moment my eyes close and then I peer through my lashes at him as I dip my fingers inside my own walls pulling the moisture out and then I start to rub my clit in small circular sweeps. My other hand is working my nipples, teasing the achy nubs and sending electrical pulses southwards through my body. All the while his eyes are on me, his mouth slack with longing. “Fuck, yes, you look so amazing. See how hard you make me baby?”
Slowly he strokes up the length of erection, letting me see how stiff he is. Rubbing the moisture of pre-cum around the distended head of his cock he begins a lazy rhythm up and down his long red member. My tongue snakes out as I watch. The more I see, the more turned on I become and my fingers start working in earnest now. Elliot moves closer to me, never taking his eyes off my pussy.
“Can I help you with that baby?”
“Please.” Without moving his hand from his cock he reaches out with his free hand to insert his fingers inside my sheath which just makes me frig my clit harder. Almost instantly I start coming, clenching my muscles around his fingers and I reach out to cup his ball sack as I do, panting and moaning out my pleasure. His response is also instant as he shoots his wad all over my stomach, grunting out my name as he comes.
“Kate, aaarggh, fuck, babe.” His forehead rests on my shoulder as we ride out the intensity of our orgasms. My hands go to his face and pull him towards mine kissing him while panting out a giggle at the same time.
“Babe, that was intense. I love watching you come.” My voice is ragged but there is no shyness in me. I understand that I would pretty much do anything for this man if he asked me and right now that would include sex in any number of public arenas. What is he doing to you?
“I love watching you too.” He pulls me down so that I am straddling his lap and I can feel that he still partially hard. My pussy is so sensitive right now that simply rubbing against him like this is likely to set me off. His lips meet mine and suddenly it is all on again.
“Again?” I am deeply impressed at how he is already ready for round two. My man has amazing stamina but I won’t let that go to his head.
He nods and I slide down his cock, impaling myself with a hiss. He is so goddamn big and he fills me up completely. I love the fullness of him inside me and I can’t stay still, sliding up his whole length which pretty much takes my ass right out of the water, before sliding back down again.
“Fuck, Kate. You are so fucking tight, you could cut off my circulation. Jesus that feels good.” I laugh and lift myself up again. He groans out his pleasure.
“Well, if you didn’t have such an enormous boner it wouldn’t be a problem now would it?” I whisper into his mouth before simultaneously impaling myself again and thrusting my tongue into his mouth.
“If you want a smaller man, I think TJ has the hots for you.” His words are ground out through his clenched teeth.
“Oh, TJ can watch if you want but I think I can handle what you’ve got Mr Grey, now fuck me hard, baby.”
“Oh, my pleasure Miss K.” And he starts to lift me up and down like I am riding a rodeo horse. My tits are jiggling in his face and with some difficulty he manages to wrangle one into his mouth biting into my nipple and making me scream. The pace is fast and intense and water is splashing everywhere. “Babe, I need to get you somewhere else so I can pound you.”
In one swift movement he stands with me still impaled on his cock and walks us out of the bathroom, grabbing a towel as we go. We make short work of drying ourselves without letting go and then he lays me down on the sheepskin rug in front of the gas fire. Zeus has been lying here but he gets up and leaves the room when we come in, which is good because having the dog watch is just a little too much kink for me.
Once I am on my back Elliot begins a full on battering of my body, burying himself balls deep inside me and pounding hard and fast. While a slow build up has its merits, this breakneck pace is so intense that I can’t hold myself or my voice back. I am crying out with every pump of his body.
“Fuck me, baby, fuck me harder.” He obliges and I can feel his pelvic bone striking at my clit with every thrust. A fire is building up rapidly inside me and the heat is flooding through my body when he reaches his hand between our bodies and quickly flicks my clit with his thumb. “Aaahhh, shit.”
The ferocity of my climax undoes me and I scream into his shoulder as he continues to thrust hard, slamming into me. My muscles involuntarily clamp around his thick cock as I keep coming in waves. Reaching for his own climax he gives one last urgent push into my pussy and I feel him pumping inside me which just sets my orgasm off on another extended wave. His mouth comes down on mine and he kisses me thoroughly, passionately as he rolls us over.
“Oh my God. I’m going to have to up my health cover. Woman, you are going to give me coronary.” I feel his chest rising and falling beneath my hand as he fights to get his breath under control which sets us off laughing again.
“Can’t you keep up, old man? Do I need to trade you in for a younger model?” I tease his ear with my lips so he can feel my smile.
“Hey, I’m not old, I’m like a classic car babe. As long as you treat me right, I will give you years of pleasure and service.”
“Oh yeah, but think about the maintenance and the cost of keeping you in good working order. As for replacement parts … I don’t know…”
“Baby, don’t even joke. You know you want what I’ve got. Those young things might be alright when you first get them but you spend all that time running them in and then they crap out pretty fast. You know, unreliable, difficult to fix. You want something that is timeless, where they built it right the first time. The chassis is in good nick and the engine will just make you purr.” His hand strokes down his muscular abs as he says this and I have to agree he is in fabulous shape and he can certainly make my engine purr. Arrogant male.
“Oh you are full of yourself.” I swat his chest lovingly.
“Ah, I think you are full of me, Miss K.” Yeah right. I unceremoniously stand up so that his now flaccid cock which has been resting inside me until now, slaps back down across his stomach. The sudden movement probably hurt me more than him but I think I have made my point as he grabs himself with a yelp and rolls curled up on his side. I go through to the bathroom to clean myself up and he follows me through. We wash again quickly then dress and head downstairs to join Jen for dinner.
By this time Karen has arrived along with TJ and Stella, so along with Ethan we have a fairly full house. We are all in good spirits and my nausea has been well within control so I am enjoying their company. At one point Ethan gives me a strange look when I refuse a glass of wine while Karen and Jen look at each other knowingly. He frowns as he tops up everyone else’s glass except mine. I want to come clean with him about the baby but it is too soon.
As we are coming to the end of the meal Elliot’s phone rings. He stands up and heads out on to the deck to take the call as we all keep talking. I watch him out the windows and I can see by his body language that something is definitely up. He is pacing the length of the deck, looking agitated. Finally he walks back in and we all stop talking and look at him.
“Kate, we need to find out everything we can about Jack Hyde, Ana’s boss at SIP.”
“Jack Hyde? Why? Do you think he is the Jack we are looking for?”
“Oh, I am fairly certain he’s our man. The fucker just tried to sexually assault Ana at work.”