PerhapsPerhapsPerhaps  – on Fanfiction.net

Author has written 6 stories for Fifty Shades Trilogy.

One Shot, maybe more if you all like it. This song was chosen for me as part of the first ever FSOG lyrics wheel, this is not usually that kind of music I write to so I was looking forward to the challenge. I hope you like where I took the story. Enjoy!

SONG INSPIRATION: You Can Do Magic, America.

I never believed in things that I couldn’t see
I said if I can’t feel it then how can it be
No, no magic could happen to me
And then I saw you

I couldn’t believe it, you took my heart
I couldn’t retrieve it, said to myself
What’s it all about
Now I know there can be no doubt

You can do magic
You can have anything that you desire
Magic, and you know
You’re the one who can put out the fire

You know darn well
When you cast your spell you will get your way
When you hypnotize with your eyes
A heart of stone can turn to clay
Doo, doo, doo …

And when the rain is beatin’ upon the window pane
And when the night it gets so cold, when I can’t sleep
Again you come to me
I hold you tight, the rain disappears
Who would believe it
With a word you dry my tears

You can do magic
You can have anything that you desire

Songwriter(s): Russell Glyn Ballard
Copyright: Russell Ballard Ltd., Union Square Music Songs Ltd.
Lyrics from <a href=”http://www.elyrics.net”>eLyrics.net</a&gt;

Buy You Can Do Magic on Itunes

The Magic of Fifty Shades

I never believed in things I couldn’t see… I guess growing up the only child of divorced parents would have the effect on a girl such as myself. My mother Carla has always been a flighty lost soul looking for love in all the wrong places and my father Ray is a true blue Army man who is taciturn in nature and stern in stature. They are proof that opposites do attract. I didn’t believe in the magic and mystery of love, the dream and hope of finding the right path. I didn’t believe that you could have everything your heart desired and be swept off your feet by a lonely prince. I have always seen the beauty in loss and sadness because they are real and tangible things.

I grew up with very little, I didn’t mind because I really didn’t know any better. I thought everyone got their prom dress at Wal-Mart off the sale rack or moved every time their mom found a new boyfriend. I was fine with having to get financial aid for college and work a part time job or two to pay for books. I was fine, only I wasn’t really. I was stuck living a life of quiet discontent waiting for something to change and then one day it finally did.

I had never been anywhere before, never been on a plane – hell never left the pacific coast, so when Kate asked me to go to Italy for a month after graduation – for free no less I jumped at the chance. Sure I had planned to get an internship at one of the publishing houses in Seattle and Settle into our new apartment, but all of that could wait. Italy was the change I was looking for.

Kate was dating Elliott Grey, a sunny blonde blue eyes god. Not only was he hot and rich, he was really good to her which was a switch from Kate’s string of losers and one-nighters. I remember her gushing about him when she came back to our apartment after interviewing his younger brother/billionaire Christian Grey for the school paper a few weeks before graduation. Elliot had crashed the interview looking for a lunch mate and found Kate in the elevator instead and it was the best thing that ever happened to either of them.

Anyway, she asked me to go and I was thrilled because I had always dreamed of Italy. The lush landscape, amazing food, crafted wine… I could imagine myself sitting in the middle of a vineyard, wearing a sun dress, eating sun warmed grapes off the vine scribbling away in my journal. It was a wonderful dream and I was not a dreamer.

Kate was going on and on weeks before the trip, full of her usual vim and vigor for life. There was a group of us going, Kate and Elliott, his younger sister Mia (who I had never met) her older brother Ethan (whom I had a small, unrequited crush on for years) and me.

I saved for a few weeks to have enough spending money for the trip and my dad sent me a check for five hundred buck for clothes. I only spent two hundred and figured the three hundred would be waiting to but stuff for work when I got back. Kate went on a spree and had three pieces of Louis Vuitton luggage in tow. I had a duffle bag and a crappy piece of Jessica Simpson luggage I got at home good for fifty bucks.

We all boarded the private GEH jet, courtesy of the billionaire brother and I remember having this strange feeling in my belly, somehow I knew life as I knew it was about to change and I welcomed it. The place was like a palace with wings, everything was pearly white leather, rich dark wood furnishings, there was even a real Degas painting over the electric fireplace. I couldn’t even phantom money like this, but everyone else seemed right at home. Elliott spoke about his brother candidly, that he had a troubled youth and he turned that angst into dollar bills. He spoke with him with such pride and adoration one would of thought that Elliot was the younger brother and not the other way around.

“I don’t know about this latest idea of his though, it seems a bit out of his ken.” Elliott wrapped his arm around Kate and they leaned back into the sofa, they hadn’t been together long but there were already so easy with one another.

“I don’t know Elliott that brother of ours has always made chicken salad out of chicken shit and now that you are on board helping him I don’t see how it can fail.”

To the shock and awe of those closest to him Christian Grey bought a failing vineyard in Tuscan wine country on a whim. He had been there for weeks trying to get the place in order and see if making a profit was possible. Elliott was a contractor so when Christian asked for his help the idea of this trip was born and grew into the lot of us drinking wine and laughing on a private plane.

It was early morning when we arrived in Italy. We were picked up in a huge black SUV by a man named Sawyer; I would later find out that he is part of Christian’s security team. We drove in sleepy silence from the airport in Rome though the hustle and bustle of the crammed city and its narrow streets, past the leaning tower of Pisa and then though wide open spaces, the rolling hills and valleys of the countryside. My entire being responded to the untouched beauty of this place, I finally felt like I found home and was exactly where I was supposed to be. I rolled down the window like an eager dog and inhaled the earthy sweet air.

“You have the most ridiculous smile on your face Steele.” Kate smiled at me warmly and rubbed my shoulder. “I am so glad you came, this is going to be the best month of your life.”

The newly minted Grey Vine Vineyard was a sight to behold, it’s sheer size and scale was over whelming to say the least. The house was in a sprawling Spanish style, white stucco and a orange tiled roof. It was surrounded with large rocket trees that swayed gently in the wind and everywhere I looked was spotted with the vibrancy of fresh blooming lavender. Sawyer led us into the open two story living room that was dominated by an oversized terracotta fireplace and enormous brown worn leather sofas. The entire house smelled like roasted chicken and tomatoes, it smelled like a home you always wanted but never had.

“Mr. Grey is down at the barrels right now, he said to relax and enjoy yourselves. If you need anything Gail is the housekeeper and can usually be found making something delicious in the kitchen and of course you can find me.” Sawyer excused himself and the boys carried out bags into the respective bedrooms. There were ten in total and we had our pick. I choose the one on the far end, it was small and soothing, all done in different shades of cream and white. It had an amazing view of the pool and the vines off in the distance and the best part, it was east facing and I looked forward to seeing thirty days of Tuscan sunrises. I hoped to have my camera ready for each and every one of them.

We all took some time getting settled; I unpacked my bags and wrote my first impression in my journal. Kate and Elliott went for a swim, Ethan and Mia wandered the property, they hit it off on the plane and I knew they would be a couple before the week was through. I felt like a fifth wheel but I didn’t mind being alone, only children are used to it. I wander down to the empty kitchen and poured myself a much needed glass of water. I could hear Kate’s laughter and the splashing of water off in the distance and felt a twinge of jealously at her happiness because I wanted what she and Elliott had. Love.

“Hello. You must be Ana.” I hear his voice come up from behind me, smooth, deep and commanding. Every muscle in my body tightens as I turn to see him. I knew he was beautiful from the picture in the school paper but the man who stood before me was something else altogether. Gone are his well-cut suits and silk ties, gone is the perfectly placed hair and baby soft jaw line. This man before me in a beautiful animal: His unruly copper hair a curly mess across his forehead, his chiseled jaw three days past a close shave. His hands were dirty as were his work boots and his face and shoulders were covered in a sheen of reddish brown dust and sweat. His baggy cargo shorts hung off his hips, the braided belt barely holding them up, the wife beater that stretches over his golden hard muscle and flesh only amplified every ripple and mound. The white fabric was dotted with pinkish purple stains, proof that he was working with the wine in the hot summer sun. He takes off his aviator sun glasses and hangs them over his shirt looking at me with a focused intent. His eyes were mesmerizing, a deep grey maybe a color that didn’t exist in nature, only to him. I force myself to blink and break the trance that has taken over my mind and body.

“Yes. Hello. I’m Ana. It’s nice to finally meet you Mr. Grey.” I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks and other hidden parts of my body and bite down on my lip looking to use pain as a much needed distraction.

“So formal Ana… Please call me Christian.” He takes a step towards me and extends his hand which I eagerly take in my own. His touch ignites my body with a heat that starts in my core and radiates outwards. I lick the bead of sweat that has formed on my upper lip and say a silent prayer to Saint Anthony to help me find my sanity. I feel dizzy and unsteady on my feet, I grab on the edge of the counter top for balance. Concern flashed across his face as he wraps his arm around my waist and leads me to a stool siting me down. He smells like the earth and the salty sea, sweet grapes and a hint of manly funk. He smells like heaven and hell.

“Ana are you alright?”

“Uh yeah. I guess the plane and all. I have never flown before.” He is standing between my legs, the soft fabric of his pants brushing against my inner thighs, the friction is not helping matters one bit. He holds my face in his hands looking at me, searing for something in my eyes. Maybe he just wants to see if I am ok. He finally decides that I am and takes a step away.

“Stop biting your lip Ana and drink your water, you must be dehydrated.” I take a tentative sip and can see his shoulders relax.

“Little bro! There you are!” The two men shakes hands but to not embrace which I find odd considering they haven’t seen on another for many weeks.

“Hello Elliott and Kate lovely to see you again.” Kate nods curtly and I am reminded that she really does not like Christian because she thinks he is a dick. Her words, not mine.

“Thank you for having us. Your place is an absolute dream.”

“Thank you Kate but it’s more like a nightmare. I will change that soon enough. Elliott come get changed I want to give you a tour.” He doesn’t even glance my way before he leaves and I feel crest fallen by his indifference. Is it possible to miss someone you just met?

“Ana go get your suit on and let’s go for a swim. You look like you could use some cooling off.”

I pulled on my black bikini and sunglasses grateful all the men were gone. I always felt less than standing next to Kate with her perfect tan body, bright fire engine red micro bikini which is just four small triangles and string. She owns it too, walking around like she is the shit because well – she is. I am too thin, to pale, to small breasted; my ass is too big in comparison to the rest of me and I am thankful that in remembered to pack a sarong to cover what needed covering.

We swam for hours in the cool salt water pool and then baked in the hot Tuscan sun. I knew I was minutes away from a sun burn so I left Kate there to roast and decided to go for a walk around the property. I slid on my flip flops and tied my sarong around my waist and headed toward the meat rows of well-shaped vines. It had only been a few hours but Italy was everything I hoped it would be. The sky was unlike any blue I had ever seen before, the sun dipping low in the sky, birds flying overhead, the constant hum of news flying around me. I had fallen in love with exhilarating smell of the earth in the air mixing with the sweet musty scent of the barrel room, the smell that I would forever associate with Christian.

I took off my sarong and laid it on the hard ground, I just wanted to sit for a few minutes and take it all in. Immerse myself in the middle of it until it became a part of me, until the landscape cast a spell over me and revealed all of its secrets and hopes and dreams. I wanted the earth to swallow me whole, for a tree to grow where my body lay so I could forever be a part of this place. Jesus where is my journal when I needed it.

I felt a presence behind me and I knew it was him. My body reacted just from his proximity and it scared me to death. I hear the shuffle of his feet and his body eclipses the sun leaving me in the cool shade of him. I crane my neck to look at him and once again I am stunned by the nature of his beauty.

“It’s a wonderful view is it not?”

“That it is. You are very lucky to have found this place Christian.”

“It found me actually.”

“How so?” He gestures down asking permission to sit and I shuffle over to make some room. With the grace of a bird in flight he sits beside me and I feel so small in his shadow.

“I wanted to buy a factory here. The Chinese were trying to outbid me; the owner said that if I buy his vineyard too and keep all the hands working he would sell me his factories for less than the Chinese were offering. So it was a two for one.”

“Sounds like destiny to me…” I am shocked by how wistful my own voice sounds.

“I didn’t take you for a dreamer Ana.”

“I try not to be but I always find myself wondering what’s it all about and then I am lost in an idea for hour upon hour sometimes even days.”

“I see and what do you think about?”

“Today I was thinking about you actually.” His jaw drops slightly at my candor and to be honest I am shocked myself. He leans closer to me, his bare shoulder pressing against mine. Christian’s grey eyes burning a hole into my heart and mind.

“And what are you thinking exactly?” I swallow the lump in my throat and bite down on my lower lip.

“Right now I am thinking about your eyes and how they have hypnotized me. I am thinking that you are not what you seem and that is a good thing. I am thinking that this place was meant for you and you for it. I think that you are broken and this place will heal you.” I watch as a bead if sweat trails down his forehead waiting for his response. His face is impassive but his eyes are burning and I think I have made a huge mistake.

“You think too much Miss. Steele.” His voice is curt and clipped as he stands abruptly leaving me bereft. “I have a call to make. Enjoy the rest of your day.”

Hours later we were all sitting around a large wooden table enjoying a late lunch of pasta, roasted chicken, tomatoes and fresh artichokes. There are many empty bottles of wine scattered around the table and a few are waiting to be opened. I felt light and relaxed despite the fact that Christian was hell bent on ignoring my existence. He won’t even look at me and has spent most of the meal silently testing on his cell phone.

“Christian…Your groundskeepers’ son was telling me about a party up the road tonight. You guys interested?” Elliot announced proudly finishing the last sip of his wine.

“I am down if the ladies are…” Ethan was always up or down for anything. Mia squealed with delight and Kate looked to me with excitement all I could do was nod in agreement.

“Christian?”

“I can’t I have a conference call tonight with China. But you guys go. The party is at the Beneventi house. Third one on the left, it’s a little hard to find the house from the road but you will hear the party before you see it.”

I was worried about what I was going to wear. I didn’t really bring anything for a party. I brought jeans, khakis, a few sundresses but nothing fancy. I didn’t even bring a pair of heels.

“Here you can wear this.” Kate flutters into my room with a small scrap of plum fabric draped over her arm and a pair of black pumps in her hand. I am relieved that she knows me so well and could sense my wardrobe angst.

“Katherine Kavanagh you are the best thank you!” I wrap her up in a hug grateful to her for so many reasons.

“Hurry up and get ready. And Steele live dangerously and don’t wear a bra. We are in Europe after all!”

I shower quickly, not used to a European bathroom and decide to just pull my wet hair into a bun and forgo makeup; I can already feel the humidity and the sweat running down my back so there really is no point. I stare at my bra and panties on the foot of the bed and then to the dress that Kate loaned me her naughty words echoing in my head. I dry off and slather my body with some sweet almond oil that I found in the bathroom while I decide what to do.

After much thought I have a “what happens in Europe stays in Europe” moment and pull the dress on sans undergarments. The slinky fabric of the dress feels strange against my bare skin and I feel sexy for the first time in my life as I step into the four inch heels Kate left or me. Maybe this will be the trip that I lose my virginity and live dangerously. A nice Italian stranger, a few glasses of wine anything could happen right. No regrets.

I straighten my shoulders, arch my back and with shaky ankles I make my way down stairs where our group has formed, how I am the last one ready I have no idea.

“Holy fuck Steele you look hot!”

I can feel all eyes on me and I guess they are just not used to seeing me this way because they all agree with Kate’s shrill battle cry. I can feel the blood rush to my cheeks in embarrassment and wish I would have put my damn panties on.

Kate links her arm with mine and then grabs Elliot’s hand as we all plow through the door. I see Christian leaning in the hallway with a strange expression on his usually unreadable face, he turns his back on me and I am sighted once again. I tried to convince myself that it didn’t matter, that he didn’t matter but I was very wrong.

As we walked up the dirt road I could hear and feel the hypnotic sound of pulsing bass, Christian was right we would hear it before we saw it. We made it to the house and walked down a narrow path encased by bushes and the heady scent of wisteria. It was lit by candles in mason jars of different sizes filled with dirt and rocks and the flickering light mixing with the music gave a very ethereal feel. Magical even. The path opened up to a large years not unlike Christian’s. And there were people everywhere, laughing, drinking and smoking, dancing and kissing. It was an assault of the senses.

Our group I five didn’t waste any time getting on the dance floor and getting lost in the music and swaying bodies. After a while our couples paired off and yet again I felt like a fifth wheel. I drifted off the side lines and grabbed myself a nice glass of red watching people live their lives from a safe distance. I had been approached by several men throughout the night but not a single one spoke to me, not the way Christian did; so much for losing my virginity to a hot Italian stranger.

We had spent a combined ten minutes together but I kept replaying them over and over in my head. It was an odd feeling taking of my subconscious, maybe even a calling, a preordained happening. Maybe all the pieces of my life aligned leading me to this very place and time. Or maybe I was just picky, lonely and horny and sad. My money is on the latter because it is painfully clear that Christian has zero interest in the likes of me.

“I didn’t take you for a wall flower Miss. Steele?” I can feel his hot breath on the back of my neck making all the hairs on my body stand on end. My breath hitches and my core tightens as I squeeze my thighs together for an ounce of relief.

“I didn’t take you for a stalker Mr. Grey.”

“Fair point well made.”

“Didn’t you have a call?”

“I did but I cancelled it the moment I saw you walk out if my house in the dress not wearing any underwear.” His arm wraps around my waist and he pulls me back towards him into the cover of night until he is pressed against a crumbling brick wall and I am pressed against him.

“How did you kn…”

“I could see the mound of your pubic hair.” Without warning he hikes up my dress and cups my sex running his fingers though my hair in small circles. For a second I think this is only a dream. This can’t really be happening but it is.

“You have bewitched me Ana.” His fingers slide past my folds and they find their target – my wet throbbing clit. I wrap my fingers around his wrist feeling the blood pump through his veins as he massages me over and over again. His lips are sucking on my neck, the harsh bristle of his beard chafing my sensitive skin and then his teeth are clamp on to my ear sending a surge of blissful pain throughout my entire body. .

“Christian… Ahhhh…” I am panting. My legs weak my heart racing. No one has ever made me come before and it is completely overwhelming. His hand grabs my aching breast squeezing the nipple hard and I come loudly with my entire being. I slack against the carved stone that is his body and his very hard erection is pressing into my lower back so hard that I think he could break my spine. His breathing is as labored as my own and I can’t see but I can hear him sucking on his fingers.

“Oh Ana how you taste.” He spins me around and before I even know what’s happening his lips crash against mine. His tongue over takes over my tentative and I can taste my salt on his lips. I have never really been kissed before and I am so unsure and uncertain but Christian is showing me the way. He turns me yet again and now my back is pressed against the wall my hips pinned with his hips. He takes me by the wrists and raises both of my arms above my head holding them in place. I feel trapped and safe all at the same time as he kisses me with a ferocity I have never known before him and will never know after him. He pulls his mouth away and gently brushes his nose against mine giving me a chance to catch my breath.

“You have turned my heart of stone into clay Ana. I don’t know how you managed it in a few short hours but you have.” We stand there is the silence of darkness, the party raging on not more they twenty feet away but it could be twenty miles because in this moment he and I are the only people in the world. He falls to his knees before me and hooks my leg around his shoulder. He looks up at me the moment his tongue brushes against me and if his hands weren’t firmly at my waist I would have fallen over. His mouth and tongue tease and torture my most hidden bits as I try to stifle my moans. I fist my fingers in his hair and sense that he likes when I pull on it, his grunt of approval proves me right.

“Oh baby, you are so fucking responsive.  king on my clit now, a forceful painful rhythm and I love it. I feel the pressure of his finger at my entrance and I freeze as it slides into me with ease. A new sensation takes over and honestly it is too much, I can feel my walls start to tremor and then I explode and scream out not caring who can hear me.

I slack, my body is a jar of jelly and he gently places both of my feet on the ground and stands before me his lips full and wet. The first drop of rain hits the ground right beside us and then a moment later another hits his broad shoulder. His mouth finds mine once again as the down pour begins. I hear the screams of the partygoers and thunder off in the distance. Christian takes my hand weaving his fingers around mine.

“Come.” We run together though the rain into the night and I finally believe in magic.

Story published with permission of the author.  FSOG characters remain the property of EL James.  Lyrics remain the property of the composer/lyricist/record company.  No copyright infringement intended.