Nurses come and go checking me over. Elliot wants to call my mother but I won’t let him. She didn’t know about the baby, she doesn’t need to know what has happened. The risks I have taken. That I have lost him. I won’t even let him call his Mom. I feel myself withdrawing completely and I can’t let him near. Only the doctors and nurses get to touch me. The bruises on my back should hurt more but I am so numb that I feel nothing. They tell me there is no damage to my other internal organs or my spine. I don’t care.
Finally around 2 in the afternoon they allow me to go home. I am told that I need complete bed rest for the next few hours and to come back for further checks but I should be fine in a day or two. But I won’t ever be fine. We won’t ever be fine, again.